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How to Hire the Right Lawyer for Your Separation and Divorce

Categories: Legal and Financial, The Process of Separation Comments (40)

hire the right lawyer for family law

So how exactly do you hire the ‘right’ lawyer? It is kind of like finding Mr. or Mrs. Right. Some time and effort need to be put into the search!

As a divorce coach, clients often report that when faced with separation and divorce, they immediately rush out and quickly hire a lawyer without much forethought. Hiring the wrong lawyer can be a costly mistake that can impact the entire process of separation and divorce from start to finish.

If you want to be in charge of your life during the business of divorce, you have to take charge and know that you and your ex-partner are the ultimate decision-makers. Hiring professionals that align with your values and agree with your goals is very important.

You are hiring a lawyer to do some work for you. You need to decide what is important to you. Then you need to research some lawyers and ask around for recommendations. Then you need to interview at least three lawyers to find someone who is a good fit for you. Then, and only then, you put down your hard-earned money and start the legal part of your separation and divorce.

Setting up interviews with three lawyers may seem like a big investment of your valuable time, but if your case gets complicated, it will pay dividends. Hiring multiple lawyers in rapid succession is a much larger waste of your time and money. Yes, I know, early in a separation lots of things are already competing for both your time and money, but this investment of your time at the start of your divorce is well worth it.

What do you need to ask and find out? The following questions may be useful to ask:

  1. How long have they been practising family law?
  2. What percentage of their practice is family law?
  3. Do they practice collaborative law?
  4. Are they willing to go to court, on your behalf, if they need to?
  5. What are the fees and how are they calculated?
  6. How much does it cost for their average divorce and how long does it usually take?
  7. What is the best way to reach them in an emergency?
  8. What are the costs and turnaround times for phone calls, email and appointments? Clarify before you get an unexpected costly invoice!
  9. What can you do to minimize your legal costs?
  10. How can either party terminate a client/attorney relationship that is not working well?
  11. Do they personally do all the work or do they work as part of a legal team?

Remember:

  1. Your lawyer is not your therapist. Lawyers often charge by the hour, so give them a short honest outline of your situation, not the long emotional version.
  2. Be honest! If you tell the lawyer the sugarcoated version of your situation you will not get advice for the true situation. You will get the sugarcoated advice, which will not be as useful as honest feedback and basic advice.
  3. To minimize your legal fees, give the lawyers the documents they ask for when they ask for them. Making them get access to them may dramatically add to your costs.
  4. Being reasonable and fair goes a long way in getting a reasonable and fair separation agreement and divorce. Most lawyers prefer not to clean up after bad behaviour.
  5. Once the legal business of divorce is initiated, it usually makes communication with your ex-partner more difficult, not better, so try and maintain good communication if it exists. This is especially important if you have children and are co-parenting. If you can continue to talk together instead of having the lawyers start sending letters back and forth things may stay more civil.
  6. You also need to remember you get to make the decisions. The lawyer gives legal advice and suggests how to proceed, but you and your ex together are the decision-makers. It is best to keep your family decisions between you. If you go to court, a judge will be making the decisions. You and your ex-spouse will give up any control over the decisions made that will affect your family and life for years to come.
  7. Is it actually time to hire a lawyer? I usually suggest other qualified divorce professionals talk with you before you hire a lawyer to get things organized and analyzed to take to the lawyer. This is especially true if you are still in the early stages and can go with your ex-partner together for an overview of your situation as a couple entering the divorce process if you are still getting along reasonably well.

Having trouble managing your separation and divorce? I can help.

Please contact me.

I do offer a strategy session.

Best regards,

Pam

Pam Mirehouse
The Divorce Coach in Dundas

Image © designer491 / depositphotos

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Comments

  1. Janet Barclay says:
    October 21, 2016 at 4:46 pm

    I wish I’d had access to this type of information back when I needed it!

    Reply
  2. Julie Stobbe says:
    October 22, 2016 at 2:50 pm

    The thing that struck me in this article was “the business of divorce”. If you can think of this event as a business deal and put into action all the good hiring and decision making skills you use in any other business situation it would be much easier. Oh to be able to separate out our emotions while doing business. A good thought for any business dealings.

    Reply
    • Pam Mirehouse says:
      December 2, 2016 at 11:44 am

      That is probably the biggest problem dealing with a divorce. Decisions fuelled by emotions are not always the best long term! It is very hard to look at things like a business deal but you really have to try and remain logical!

      Reply
  3. Brian Fleming says:
    December 2, 2016 at 3:18 am

    Finding the right lawyer is like finding true friend,very rare. I must admit that so think wisely!

    Reply
    • Pam Mirehouse says:
      December 2, 2016 at 11:41 am

      So true Brian! It is so important to your outcome to invest the time on finding the best fit!

      Reply
  4. Thomas Wyckoff says:
    December 27, 2016 at 6:28 am

    Hii Pam Mirehouse,

    What divorce lawyers say and what they do can be very different outcomes. Although their intentions may be pure the cases can be quite complicated. Nonetheless, it is always better to have a dedicated and experienced divorce lawyer in your corner if you find yourself going through the divorce process.

    Regards,
    Thomas Wyckoff

    Reply
  5. product liability NJ says:
    January 24, 2017 at 11:34 pm

    Legal matters are a big deal and must always be handled by professionals with high knowledge on the matter.

    Reply
    • Pam Mirehouse says:
      January 28, 2017 at 12:38 pm

      I absolutely agree. Always get sound legal advice. Decisions made should not be made lightly or with just advice from friends and family during a marriage break up. The decisions made during a divorce or while negotiating your separation agreement will affect the rest of your life! Make the right decision for you and your family!

      Reply
  6. family law lawyers Brisbane says:
    February 8, 2017 at 4:08 am

    Regarding your legal concerns and questions, always ask the best of legal firms.

    Reply
  7. Sam Mollaei, Esq says:
    February 18, 2017 at 11:59 am

    This is very important info for all of them for doing this work with better if you hire a bogus lawyer you will lose more money. You have to know how to hire the right lawyer for your separation and divorce. I hope that will be very important to me as well. I am very much happy for that.

    Reply
  8. Attorney NY says:
    April 5, 2017 at 2:49 am

    The best lawyers in your city can carry out task faster and more efficient with the best results in your favor.

    Reply
  9. Chris Juaen says:
    May 13, 2017 at 2:01 am

    Nice Post…. @…..!
    Hiring a lawyer is not an easy task, either we hire property lawyer, child custody lawyer or any other type of lawyer. Because our whole case result depends upon the selection of the right lawyer. A right lawyer is as good friends who understand our problem and try to provide the justice. But the process of selection of right lawyer is very responsible work. Your article discussed all those key point which we need to keep in mind before hiring a writer lawyer. Thanks for sharing such a informative knowledge.
    I will wait for your next post…….. …….!
    All the best……………………………………!

    Reply
  10. Brisbane divorce settlements says:
    June 21, 2017 at 2:49 am

    Legal assistance from the best professionals is always the best option for your needs on legal terms.

    Reply
    • Insurance coverage lawyers NY says:
      July 5, 2017 at 3:22 am

      In regards with legal advice and other legal processes, it’s always better to seek the help of the best professionals.

      Reply
  11. diploma legal services Sydney says:
    August 3, 2017 at 5:25 am

    To be the best in your field. You need to have the training and best course available

    Reply
  12. Aaron C. says:
    August 4, 2017 at 2:56 pm

    Finding the right lawyer is important to make sure you can keep in touch with your children. Thanks for writing!

    Reply
    • Pam Mirehouse says:
      August 4, 2017 at 3:32 pm

      Thank you Aaron! It really can make a big difference!

      Reply
  13. Brisbane property settlement agreement says:
    August 31, 2017 at 2:40 am

    A good lawyer will help you in every way you need that will assure you of good outcome.

    Reply
  14. Brisbane domestic violence lawyer says:
    September 13, 2017 at 5:51 am

    Only the best and brightest for your legal needs for the best assurance of your needs.

    Reply
  15. civil litigation NJ says:
    September 27, 2017 at 3:33 am

    The best lawyers in your city can carry out task faster and more efficient with the best results in your favor.

    Reply
  16. property settlement agreement Brisbane says:
    October 11, 2017 at 3:18 am

    Legal assistance from the best professionals is always the best option for your needs on legal terms.

    Reply
  17. Lawyer Guide says:
    December 26, 2017 at 4:49 am

    I love that you said lawyers are not your therapists.

    Reply
    • Pam Mirehouse says:
      December 26, 2017 at 2:26 pm

      🙂

      Reply
  18. Jeff says:
    December 26, 2017 at 7:05 am

    I appreciate your post, a good lawyer will help you in every way you need that will assure you of good outcome. Thanks For sharing.

    Reply
  19. Richard James says:
    January 2, 2018 at 1:20 pm

    This is one of the great article about hire right Divorced lawer, before divorced it is very important to find the right diorced lawer, So I think it is informative and helpful post the people. Thanks for sharing this awesome article.

    We are law agency, so we are committed to Divorce Resolution through high-quality client care.

    Reply
  20. Zara Brown says:
    January 13, 2018 at 3:38 pm

    Thanks for discussing about hiring a best lawyer for divorced Resolution. Definitely some great tips and advice to keep in mind when going through this experience. Hiring a mediator can be a good option, but sometimes the best is hiring a lawyer to make sure everything is being handled in the best legal fashion. So I think it’s useful for many those who are looking for such info, I really appreciate you, keep it up.!

    Reply
    • Pam Mirehouse says:
      January 18, 2018 at 11:50 am

      Thank you, Zara! I appreciate the comment and yes – lawyers are not the only professionals that can help with a successful separation and divorce!

      Reply
  21. NJ Lawyer says:
    February 14, 2018 at 2:48 am

    Don’t settle for cheap lawyers if you can afford to get a good one. It is smart to get the best if you need to.

    Reply
  22. mediation Lawyer Gold Coast says:
    July 26, 2018 at 3:59 am

    Good lawyers attend continuing education and special training programs, which help them stay abreast of developments in their area of law, participate in various discussion panels, and write articles and books

    Reply
  23. ambransh bhandari says:
    August 1, 2018 at 7:48 am

    Finding the right lawyer is tough but once you get a good lawyer all your you can get rid off your legal problems.
    Excellent content thanks for sharing!

    Reply
  24. law firm says:
    August 7, 2018 at 5:53 am

    Great tips. This article gives good information about Family law. Thanks for sharing this information.

    Reply
    • Pam Mirehouse says:
      August 7, 2018 at 2:00 pm

      Thank you!

      Reply
  25. Nitish says:
    September 9, 2018 at 5:56 am

    A lawyer should also be sensitive enough to go for settlement when there is a possibility of patch up.

    Reply
  26. law firm says:
    September 18, 2018 at 5:54 am

    Great tips. This article gives good information about divorce. Thanks for sharing this information.

    Reply
    • Pam Mirehouse says:
      September 18, 2018 at 6:52 am

      Thank you! Hiring the right lawyer makes such a big difference!

      Reply
  27. Nitish Banka says:
    October 5, 2018 at 5:48 am

    Divorce and separation are very sensitive matters. one must hire an attorney as per the article nice tips.

    Reply
  28. nitish banka says:
    October 25, 2018 at 1:22 pm

    A professional advice is important to take important decision. A professional lawyer is necessary for a good decision

    Reply
  29. Belli, Weil & Grozbean says:
    December 7, 2018 at 5:15 am

    Hey Pam,

    Very Informative Article! Thanks for sharing basic information to find the right lawyer for separation or divorce.

    Reply
    • Pam Mirehouse says:
      December 8, 2018 at 1:56 pm

      Glad you like the article!

      Reply
  30. Lawyer says:
    January 10, 2019 at 2:54 am

    It is very important to find a right lawyer before taking a step in getting a divorce and attorney should also make their clients feel comfortable so that people can share their problems related the case.

    Reply

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