Blog - The Separation Project

Happiness is an Inside Job

Posted on October 18, 2018 by Pam Mirehouse | 0 Comments

Many years before I separated, fairly early on in my marriage, I was told emphatically by a helpful professional: “You are NOT responsible for your partner’s happiness. They are 100% responsible for their own happiness and unhappiness. It has nothing to do with you.” I felt such an amazing flood of relief. I remember crying very hard, full on messy…

Share this:

Who is Responsible for How You Feel?

Posted on September 20, 2018 by Pam Mirehouse | 2 Comments

Often, a separation or divorce brings up some very difficult to manage emotions. We usually blame our ex-partners for all our difficult hurt feelings. It must be their fault that you feel sad, mad, bad or even glad. May I suggest that your feelings are actually much more under your control than you realize? Emotions are your choice. Difficult feelings will not completely disappear,…

Share this:

Blue Skies Ahead! Separation and Divorce Seminar and Support Group

Rebuilding Your Life After Separation and Divorce

Posted on August 16, 2018 by Pam Mirehouse | 4 Comments

My sleep was fretful. My appetite was non-existent. I lost over 30 pounds and felt sick most of the time. I got compliments on how “great” I looked. “Thanks,” my ‘happy mask’ said. Everyone wanted to know my weight loss secret! I would not say it was unrelenting STRESS! No one knew what I was going through during our “marital…

Share this:

7 Ideas about the Intense Emotions Felt during Separation and Divorce.

Posted on July 19, 2018 by Pam Mirehouse | 2 Comments

The emotions usually felt during separation and divorce do follow a pattern. You are not alone. Many others have gone through similar emotional journeys. You, and others in your family, although you are on the same journey, will probably be at very different places and feeling very different emotions. The stages and feelings will be similar but the start and…

Share this:

Emotional Hijacking During Separation and Divorce Explained

Posted on June 21, 2018 by Pam Mirehouse | 6 Comments

Good decision making during separation and divorce is often hijacked by strong, out of control and overwhelming emotional reactions. Just when you need your logic, creativity and problem-solving skills the most, your thinking brain shuts down, and you become very reactive and unable to think straight. This emotional response to perceived danger is due to the fight or flight response. I…

Share this:

How Divorce Coaching Can Save You Big Money

Posted on May 17, 2018 by Pam Mirehouse | 0 Comments

I passionately believe that hiring me as your Divorce Coach can actually save you money – big money! I often find people resistant to paying for specialized professional services during their separation and divorce, because they feel that the legal costs are already overwhelming them. There are some very helpful divorce specialists that can save you money in the long-run,…

Share this:

The Emotional Journey Through Separation and Divorce – What Should YOU Expect?

Posted on April 19, 2018 by Pam Mirehouse | 2 Comments

The emotions you experience during a marriage breakup are usually gut-wrenching and much more difficult to navigate than you expect. Nothing can really prepare you for the intensity of your feelings or the length of time your emotions will be hard to handle. I have found that knowing what to expect and knowing you will get to a better place are…

Share this:

Change During Separation and Divorce – 6 Ideas on Why Change is so Hard and How to Best Cope

Posted on March 22, 2018 by Pam Mirehouse | 8 Comments

Why is change so difficult and overwhelming during separation and divorce? The extent of the change is usually massive and it may impact all areas of your life. The speed of making the changes is often very fast and there is little time for adjusting, preparation or proper planning. The emotional upheaval during separation and divorce may make decision-making and…

Share this:

Valentine’s Day – Let’s celebrate ourselves by examining three different but important types of self-care!

Posted on February 14, 2018 by Pam Mirehouse | 4 Comments

Valentine’s Day is a great time to celebrate yourself, wherever you are on your self-care journey. There are, as I see it, three different varieties of self-care. Please look at all three types below and the questions I would like you to ask yourself about for each type. I want to emphasize that self-care is just that – self-care. If…

Share this:

Divorce – The truth about what it really is.

Posted on January 18, 2018 by Pam Mirehouse | 4 Comments

Divorce – what does the word divorce really mean? The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines it as “the action or an instance of legally dissolving a marriage” (Merriam Webster, 2017). Divorce does indeed involve the legal action of “dissolving a marriage” but there are many other things involved in the process that adds to the difficulty we have going through a divorce. All divorces have three…

Share this:

Why You Need to Know YOUR Finances: Married, Separated, Divorced, Widowed or Single. Part 3: Control + Action = Power!

Posted on December 21, 2017 by Pam Mirehouse | 4 Comments

In October I wrote about the fact that your finances need your attention and that Ignorance ≠ Bliss. In November I wrote about setting aside time and energy to learn about your personal finances and the relevant financial information is an important step to give you more understanding and how Knowledge leads to Control. Now, what do you need to…

Share this:

Why You Need to Know YOUR Finances: Married, Separated, Divorced, Widowed or Single. Part 2: Knowledge = Control!

Posted on November 16, 2017 by Pam Mirehouse | 2 Comments

Knowledge about your finances can set you up to feel more in control and less stressed. Last month I wrote about how ignorance of our finances often leads to stress and financial woes. You can find the blog here. This month, I’m going to suggest ways to get comfortable with finances that will help you learn, ease your concerns and…

Share this:

Previous Posts